I like me.

I was overcome with emotion the other night. Sometimes it paralizes me. Fleeting thoughts of not being good enough. Overwhelming feelings of worthlessness. One person could say something and I take it another way looking through my glasses of insecurity. I have been seeking the Lord and asking Him to help me see myself differently. I'm tired of being offended because I choose to let others opinions of me be more important than His or even my own. So as I laid in bed with my husbands arms wrapped around me, I had little comfort as my hands tingled and my chest felt heavy with hopelessness, tears in a steady stream down both cheeks... I went to the Lord with my heart and He asked me "Do you like you?" After I got everyone else's voices out of my head, I smiled and responded "Yes. I think I'm amazing. I like me. I'd love me, I'd seek out a friendship with me, I'd consider myself blessed to be married to me." All of a sudden it was as if I was free. I felt light and somehow, content with who I am. I like me. Its so simple, but took me so long to realize.

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Wasted Time

Pastor Todd pointed something out that I hadn't recognized before. The story of the Prodigal Son. We often define him simply as wayward. But the truth is that the definition of prodical is wasteful, lavish, Ouch. I quickly examined my year. I was often stuck at home due to the lack of ability to handle two children under the age of two in public. So, what did I do with my time at home? Did I pray enough, play enough... read enough? If I put a value on the time I had been given, how much had I squandered, given to useless things? I may have found myself on the couch too much, crying instead of praying, complaining instead of praising.

If you want something done. give it to someone who is busy. - Isn't that the truth!

I'm seeking motivation, determiniation and a zest to accomplish more this year.

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